Sweet Sacrifice
by rawrimadaniisaur
Summary: Callie is self harming because of Tayla? takes place right after the Liam comment. Warning this is T for heavier themes so be careful when reading so this is your trigger warning don't read if your not up to it. Love you and please read and review.
1. Chapter 1

**Hi my beautiful love muffins I am going to write about him from Callie and Brandon's point of view. I hope you like it I got the inspiration from Sweet Sacrifice by Evanescene. And as to the story line this was just an idea I came up with, I have never been abused but I have hurt myself but I do not any longer.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the show or the cast.**

**~Callie~**

I can't believe her she really stooped so low as to read my diary and then try and use it not only against me but Jude as well. God can I please murder her all she does is insult me. He broke us he hurt us he hurt Jude and she would use that with pride. I got up and ran out of the room just outside. I could still hear into the room.

"Well someone is quite touchy don't you think." Tayla said and I could hear the smirk she held on her face.

"What was that all about?" Lena questioned.

"I don't know do you want me to go check or should we give her some space?" Steph said concerned.

"I'll go check." Brandon said trying to be all heroic.

"No just give her some space all she does is run around craving attention lucky for you you're getting rid of her soon." Tayla said being her bitchy self.

"Enough stop being so rude to my sister leave her alone and get that stick out of your ass!" Jude screamed. I wish he didn't swear but he's picked it up over the years.

"Jude calm down and Tayla what the hell was that about" Lena said in her usual tone.

"Just look at her everything about her screams attention craving drama queen." Tayla said the attitude seeping out of her words.

"That's it leave get out of my house." Steph yelled in anger.

Tayla scoffed and said "Whatever I don't want to deal with your homeless shelter anymore anyways. Brandon you really should move in with your dad." She turned and walked out the door and I hid behind a plant.

"Okay Jude I just want you to know we don't accept that kind of language in this house I understand you were mad but please let's keep it PG in here okay." Lena explained.

"I'm going to fine Callie." Brandon said.

I ran out from behind the plant and took a sprint to wherever my feet would take me. I did not want him to see me like this. I hate it when anyone sees me like this when I'm broken and hurt. Okay so maybe I should explain. Liam was my ex-boyfriend and he was really abusive, but I was in love with him. I lost virginity to him and things were fine he was only hurting me until he laid his hands on Jude then things got really bad. He made me stay with him and he started hurting me even more and sometimes Jude. I finally had enough and I flipped out on him and he pulled a knife on me. He cut my arms slowly and said that if I ever disobeyed him again the same thing would happen to Jude. I started cutting myself realizing that what's it worth I'm going to get hurt anyways. Eventually things got really bad and I was sent to the hospital for it and Liam hurt Jude again and our foster parents sent us back to the system because they couldn't handle it any longer. We ended up with our last foster dad and now we're here. I felt really guilty for putting Jude through all of that. When I snapped back into reality I realized that I was in my old favorite spot to run away to when I was in a house near here. It was where I used to come up to just scream and write songs and now it's going to be used as a place to cry and probably cut again…I just can't take all of this anymore. Jude is going to be so disappointed in me. I opened the locket that I keep around my neck and the razor blade fell out.

"I missed you it truly has been to long old friend." I whispered to myself. I delicately brought the blade to my wrist and I could still faintly see the scars in the darkness. I was about to start when I couldn't even see because the tears were coming in to quickly. I wiped my eyes and slowly ran the blade across my wrist it burned and the pain was all too familiar. I saw the scarlet colored liquid running out of my arm and brought it up again. And made another mark across my arm watching it flow out until a drop of blood dropped down to the floor. Soon my years were mixed with the blood covering my wrist, god how deep were those two cuts? Never mind that I brought it up again and made five more little marks. Liam, Jude, My foster dad, Tayla, Brandon, my mom, disappointing them, disappointing myself. Soon the blood was flowing freely out of my wrist and I made no move to stop it. I just sat there crying silently. Then I blanked out on the world I don't know what happened I just couldn't see or hear or feel.

~Brandon~

God where is she I know she can't have gone very far. I stopped dead in my tracks when I came to the woods and saw her lying there so lifeless so cold. No she can't just die like this why Tayla had to be so cold I will never understand. I pulled out my phone and called 911. Soon enough an ambulance was here and so were Steph and Lena were here to pick me up and drive me to the hospital. Why would she do that to herself? That's all I could ask on the way there Jude was a wreck mumbling on and on about how she promised she would never do it again. How she broke her promise. I knew he felt ten times worse than I did. When we arrived we went straight to her room. The doctor explained that she had been cutting and went in to deep on a vein and lost quite a lot of blood but they were giving her some and she may be unconscious for a little while but she should be waking up soon. I ran over to her and took a look at her arms they were wrapped up with little blood seeping through. She had spaced them out because they were from her wrist to half way up to her elbow. Jude ran over and started whispering to her. I just walked away and called Tayla.

"Hey Brandon sorry for earlier but you know she was being a bitch I couldn't help myself you know?" she said all happily.

"We're over." I said coldly.

"What do you mean we're over Brandon this isn't over because of her she's just some bitch anyways."

"No she's not but you are and now thanks to you she's lying on a hospital bed."

"It's what she deserves she never needed everything she got but people gave it to her anyways and she responds by what trying to kill herself."

"What are you going to do with that huh knowing you, you'll spread that all over the school." I screamed not wanting her to know what happened.

"Well the people deserve to know if they're going to school with a criminal slash suicidal maniac." She screamed back.

"Goodbye and just remember we're through!" I yelled throwing my phone down.

I ran back to the room to Callie starting to wake up. As soon as her eyes were open she started screaming. A nurse rushed in and explained the situation to Callie.

"Oh… well where's Jude?" She said calmly and only about a minute later the family ran in. Jude rushed over to her side asking why and she started crying and whispering apologies to all of us.

"Hello my name is Dr. Jackson and we have some things to discuss." He said looking at my moms and Callie.

"Okay kiddos out." Steph said to all of us.

**Hehehe cliffhanger so originally this was going to be a one shot and now it's going to be a multi chapter, I just want to say please don't take this as a cutting or self-harm is okay please I've gone through it and its not pretty. Thank you my beautiful love muffins read and review. Kisses xoxo**


	2. Chapter 2

**Well I'm back I know it's so soon but I read my reviews and loved what you had to say and was told that I could be killed for my cliffy by RainbowUnicornsR-MyLife so I shall continue this for you. Also check out the fosters wiki page for me *bats eyes*. Alright read on my love muffins.**

**Disclaimer:Do we have to do this every time? I DO NOT OWN THE SHOW**

~Callie~

So she kicked all of them out of the room which is understandable but what is she going to do with us? They could just send us back to the system or put me back in the hospital again. I feel so bad why did I have to put Jude through all of this again? I am a truly horrible sister.

"Okay I don't know if you two are aware of this but Callie has been hospitalized before for self-harm and suicidal thoughts and actions before she was put on anti-depressants and anxiety medications which the prescription was never filled out for." He said giving me a pointed look. "Also we found older scars and bruises all over her body, is there an explanation for those?"

"Well the prescription was never filled because when I got home I was put back into the system and put into a new foster home with an abusive father which is the reason for the bruises and scars." I said with a strong voice even though I was anything but it.

"Okay well we're going to have to have her go in for a physc-eval before we can clearly decide what we want to do. Now I understand if you two would like to have her hospitalized just so she's closely watched over knowing that with your jobs and the amount of children you have you can't do that. But just know that if you choose to do that you need to be there to support her during and after the fact. We're not sure yet but this relapse may be caused by the fact that no one wanted her after she first started and after she stopped she was thrown into a situation where she was getting g hurt. Now that she's here and we realize that this situation is temporary she needs support to not have these relapses."

"Of course we'll support her; even though we're not permanent we are going to try our hardest to make her feel comfortable." Lena said.

"Also we may not be there all the time but I don't want her hospitalized, she shares a room with one of my daughters who will look after her and goes to school with all of my kids who will make sure things are okay. If things get so bad that we need to have her get support that we can't give her, which I don't think will happen we'll get her it."

"Okay well I'll go get nurse Becky so come and do her evaluation, you two will need to be out of the room for that. Then when she's gotten the information from Callie she'll talk to you two and then all three of you together. For the mean time there someplace safe your children could go and possibly stay the night?"

"Yes is it okay if we bring them in here just to explain and let them see Callie is okay?" Lena asked politely.

"Of course." He replied leaving the room.

Soon enough all of the kids were in here rushing over to me.

"Callie thank god you're okay. You promised you wouldn't do it again." Jude said crying.

"Okay dude seriously that is totally something that will totes make it harder to wear strapless or sleeveless." Mariana said trying to be funny in that way showing she will never understand.

"And I thought that I was the one who needed meds." Jesus said smiling. Steph gave him the death glare.

"Jesus that is rude." She yelled.

"Sorry mom sorry Callie." He said in a truly regretful tone.

"Oh thank god you're okay when I found you in the woods I thought you were dead and I would have killed myself for not being able to find you faster." Brandon said hugging me.

For the first time they came into the room and all threw their thoughts at me I spoke.

"So Mariana you're the fashion guru if I can't wear strapless and sleeveless what should I wear?" I asked seriously hoping she would have something for me to help cover it and look normal.

"Well when you come home you can raid my closet." She said smiling with relief at the fact that I A wanted her help and B wasn't being mad/ holding a grudge against her.

"Great I'd love that." I said smiling back.

"So my babies me mom and Callie may be overnight with the doctors so you guys need a place to stay." Steph said.

"I can stay with Lexi." Mariana exclaimed happily at the fact that she could go over her friend's house on a school night and it was only 8:30 so they had plenty of time.

"I can go over Alex's house." Jesus said with lack of emotion.

"I'll go over my dad's house and I can probably bring Jude." Brandon said kind of sadly.

"What about Tayla I'm sure she'd love to have you over after your fight." Lena suggested knowing they didn't get much time together anymore.

"We broke up." He said plainly.

"Oh my gosh baby I'm sorry." My moms said rushing over to him.

"Don't be she was being overly rude to all of my siblings and I don't want to be with someone like that." He said looking over at me with the question of if she was the reason why in his eyes.

"Alright well if we have things all figured out then out go off Lena will drive you all and I'll stay here with Callie till she's back." Steph said. They all left so it was just me and her.

"Okay listen I'm really sorry, I know you didn't sign up for this and you probably think I'm an idiot and want to send me back or put me in the hospital but just make sure Jude's okay please." I said to her nicely but I ended up crying.

"Sweetie believe me I don't think any less of you. In fact I used to hurt myself and I want to help you get over it. I love having you here in fact if it weren't for the lack of space you and Jude with be living with us permanently." She said and I could hear the truth in her voice.

"Okay so listen I am really sorry about doing it… Tayla read my journal and Liam is a very important person in my life. Her bringing him up brought back memories that I was pushing away." I explained.

"Okay well I know I'm going to want to hear more about Liam but later when you're better. Listen to me even though you may not be as innocent as some people I don't love you any less than I love Brandon. Your strong and independent and you've been through a lot." She said giving me a hug.

"Thank you…mom." I knew it was a big step and a huge risk but that's what I think of her as. She squeezed tighter and whispered the word. When she pulled away a nurse walked in.

"Hello my name is Becky and I'm here to do your evaluation could mom step out of the room please there's a waiting room just down the hall." She said kindly.

"Okay yeah that's fine remember Callie I love you." She said walking out of the room. Once she was gone Becky took a seat next to me and crossed her legs getting out a pen.

"Hi I'm Becky and I'm just going to ask you a few questions and please do your best and answer honestly."

"Okay." I said scared I've been evaluated before but it still creeps me out.

**Done with this chapter don't worry there will be romance soon but not yet. What'd you think like it hate it? Well I won't know unless you review it. I'll update soon I promise. Stay beautiful my little love muffins and Check out the fosters wiki page. 3 #lovemuffinsarecool**


	3. Chapter 3

**I'm back sorry for the wait so muffins I was at camp so please don't hate me I missed you guys so much. But I'm back I saw the episoides really need to add the Liam=stalker thing in soon my muffins. So we're gonna pretend the Jesus and Lexi thing isn't happening but Callie and Wyatt will but wait there will be Brallie.**

**Disclaimer: again really I'm mad I don't own the show.**

~Callie~

All the questions made me want to run away or have my body shut down. It was all so personal it was like she was just questioning my whole life and I really didn't like it. It made me feel so uncomfortable. My heart was racing I mean I should be used to it but actually having someone who cares makes it feel like I betrayed them that I'm not good enough for them. Once we finished she left and went to a private room to discuss with Steph ad Lena. I am a horrible person I put them through the Jude situation and now this. Do I really not care that much. I want to stay Jude wants to stay and I'm not only hurting any chances for me but also for Jude. I know they say that this is only a way station but I was hoping maybe they would decide to keep us. Fat chance now that I went out and did this.

"Hello do you want anything to eat or drink?" asked a nurse who I didn't notice walked in.

"Yes please." I said figuring that if I said no they would think I am anorexic as well.

"Okay I'll be right back with a meal for you, are you allergic to anything?" she asked.

"No I am not anything will be fine." I said trying to smile but realizing that it hurt too much.

"Okay." She said with a bright smile.

Once she left I burst into tears realizing that I really had ruined it for Jude not just this home but hope and dream that I was better. I'm not someone that he should look up to. Soon the nurse came back with my food and Doctor Jackson walked in with Steph and Becky.

"Hey honey Lena went home to get some rest but I'll stay here with you and I'm taking the day off work as well okay." She said rubbing my arm.

"Yeah that's fine. So what did we decide?" I asked scared.

"Well Callie it seems that this was just a temporary relapse so we're going to send you home but if this happens again we will be taking you into hospital also we are assigning you to a therapist who you will see twice a week." He said in a tone that made you think he wanted to put me in the hospital.

"Alright kiddo come on get dressed and let's get going." Steph said. I looked over at the time and it was 2 in the morning. How long was I out? I obligated and grabbed my things went to the bathroom and changed into my clothes slowly being careful not to mess up the bandages on my wrist. I walked out of the bathroom and before they noticed me I heard the end of their conversation.

"I don't care what you want I love her like she is my own child because she is I do not want her in a hospital feeling like nobody cares!" my mom screamed at the doctor. When she saw me she grabbed my hand, the prescription, and her purse said thank you and left.

"What was that all about Mom?" I asked scared.

"They wanted to keep you here for a week or two because this has happened before. But I refused and we got into a small argument that's all sweet heart." She said kindly.

"Okay well don't feel bad if you need to send me in I mean it's only because you want to help." I said kindly. Wait why would I say that I hated that place. Never mind I walked into the house.

"Okay so you're not going to school tomorrow instead you're going to spend some time with me and Lena now get some sleep I'll wake you up around ten okay.

"Okay night mom." I said hugged her and walked away as her face lit up. Soon enough I was asleep.

~At ten or so~

I woke up to the light sound of Lena's voice. I lightly moved and went to rub my eyes but then felt the extreme pain in my arm and shot up screaming in agony. My body was not ready for the sudden movements that I brought to it. Lena handed my some pain killers and a glass of milk.

"Take it easy sweetheart okay do you know where you are?" she asked kindly.

"Yeah mom I'm at home." I said and she beamed.

"That's right so me and Steph are going to take you to the salon the spa and then to get our nails done sound good?" she asked.

"You guys don't need to do that." I said shocked that they were being so nice about all of this.

"Yes darling but we want to." She said.

I got changed into nice clothes and put on some makeup and walked downstairs where they kindly greeted me.

"You look beautiful." Lena said kindly.

"Thank you, you do to." I said trying to put a nice voice on through the pain.

"We want you to have this." Steph said handing me a phone.

"Oh my gosh thank you so much but I don't deserve this I disappointed you why are you being so nice to me?" I said strangely.

"Because we realized that maybe we needed to help you see that we care." They said.

"Okay kiddo lets go our appointment is at 10:45." Steph said opening the door.

We left and started on our way to the salon the first of many trips.

**A/N I'm still sorry for not writing for so long but I'm updating either later today or tomorrow to make it up to you guys. So how do you think she's going to look? Hmmmm? If you have any ideas for changes that you want me to do to her appearance and outfits comment or inbox them to me. Love you muffins hope you enjoyed. And don't forget to comment it makes me feel good about myself.**


	4. Chapter 4

**I said I would be back and here I am. I missed you my beautiful love muffins. So nobody said how I should change up her look so I decided myself. Don't worry you guys nothings major just wait and see. Enjoy 3.**

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned the show but I do not.**

~Callie~

We finally got home at around three when I walked in all of my siblings were waiting at the kitchen table eating random snacks. Except for Jude who doesn't like eating between meals. They all ran up and hugged me and when they let go they all looked me over. Brandon and Jesus' jaws dropped. Marianas eyes lit up seeing that maybe she could finally dress me up and Jude looked happy to see that I finally changed a little bit. My normally dull lifeless hair had volume caramel highlights and my tips were a darker brown finishing it off the underside of my hair was also caramel colored with hints of purple. I had black acrylic nails and my skin was nicely spray tanned. My skin had more of a glow to it also I had gauges in and I got my double industrial done.

"Sorry we're home so late guys the piercing took longer than expected we we're supposed to beat you guys home." I said my voice strong as ever.

I looked at all of them waiting for someone to speak but nobody did. Finally Lena said something to snap them out of their trance.

"Kiddos it's not nice to stare at people it makes them feel self-conscious."

"OMG you look great I love what you did with your hair no we just need to style it maybe pin it back in a crown around your head or something and make sure you wear you wear your hair up tomorrow so that people can see that piercing and the underside of your hair. And you could totally do a kick ass outfit you know to show people that they can't mess with you." Mariana blurted out.

"Actually I still need to go clothes shopping maybe you could come with me" I said knowing she would insist she had to anyways.

"Yes yay we can go to Sephora to get you makeup first then we can go to hot topic and Spencers then maybe Macey's then to Victoria's Secret and Pink and finish off by going to Journeys and the converse store for your shoes. Sound good?" she said looking at me and moms.

"Yes okay babies the state gave us 7 thousand for Callie and five thousand for Jude so boys go with me and Jude and Mariana go with Callie and Lena. Try to be home around eight if possible." Steph said walking out to her cars the boys following.

"Yay okay so we're going do an edgy look right I mean it really works with your personality and then you can borrow my clothes some days that way people will notice you and think that you have a cute little soft side you know." she said as we walked to the car.

"Okay I guess." I said rolling my eyes. All of a sudden my phone chimed with a text from Brandon.

Brandon: Hey you look stunning such a nice change not that you need to change just you looked nice.

Thanks hey just make sure that Jude buys cute clothes okay I don't want him to look bad.

I locked my phone and started talking to Mariana until my phone rang again for Brandon Jesus and an unknown number.

Brandon: will do.

Jesus: Hey Callie what's up?"

Unknown: hey its Wyatt, Jesus gave me your number. Where we're you today I missed seeing your pretty face.

As I went to respond Lena shook her head.

"No revealing secrets I knew Steph would get one of the boys to ask just turn your phone off and respond later.

~At the Mall~

As soon as we arrived Mariana dragged me out of the car and strait into hot topic.

"So we should probably get you some bracelets to you know cover up… sorry was that rude I just I figured you wouldn't want people knowing."

"No yeah let's get some bracelets then some jeans maybe." I said trying to be sweet about the fact that she was having way to much fun with this.

So we grabbed me a studded cuff bracelet a skull bracelet and a triple wraparound bracelet with little round studs on it. Then we grabbed some silicone bracelets. They were mainly for bands so it was Sleeping with Sirens, Pierce the Veil, Falling in Reverse and Fit For Rivals. That way I could wear one or two on each arm. Then we got me a batman necklace and a cross with a skull necklace which Mariana says will be my signature necklaces. We moved onto jeans I got a pair of shredded black super skinny jeans and pair of half red and half checker prints skinny jeans. We got me a pair of distressed black tight shorts which were too short but I got a pair of galaxy leggings to go under them. I also got cross, black, red and checker print leggings. Then to go over them I got red yellow blue and pink acid washed distressed super skinny shorts. I got a batman and a superman shirt then I batman and a studded belt. I finished that off with grabbing a three pack of adventure time panties. Once we checked all of that out we went into Spencer's. When we were there I got a batman snapback with a cape and a reckless snapback but Lena drew the line there looking at how inappropriate their store was. I talked her into letting me get beanies in the colors of the rainbow. Then we ran into a few other stores and got me a cute cross top, a shirt that said you have to be kitten me right meow, a few cute tight colored tank tops and a jean vest to go over them, an infinity sign shirt and a few other tops. Then I bought bras and panties and frankly you don't need to know about those. As for shoes I bought black high tops black high high tops you know the ones that go to your knees a pair of low tops actually three one in black one in red and one in purple a cute pair of ballet flats in a charcoal gray and a pair of black stilettos with little bows on the back. Then we went to Sephora to go and buy makeup. I got five kinds of extra black eyeliner 7 different types of mascara 5 black one navy and the last one teal. Lastly I got a natural eye shadow pallet a smoky eye shadow pallet and a glitter pallet. Four lipsticks and matching lip liners and glosses, they were in red maroon pink and bubblegum pink. Then we bought foundation and concealer makeup remover and face cleanser. As soon as I thought we were finished Mariana dragged me into a few other stores to buy more jeans some skirts and a few dresses. Once we finished with that she dragged me into a hair accessories store to buy bobby pins hair ties bows and clips but not headbands saying that they didn't really go with my facial structure. I tried to say no saying that I had the hats but she wouldn't listen and made me get the hair accessories anyways. We also got me a cute black purse and a nice wallet adventure time wallet from spencer's to match. An more jewelry so that I could always have matching accessories

"Thank you again Mariana for doing all of this you know you didn't have to help." I said sweetly.

"No need to thank me I find it so much fun getting to dress people up I'm just happy that you're so open to my ideas you know. Also you have to let me do your hair and makeup for tomorrow I have so many ideas." She said grinning.

"Okay babies it's almost eight we need to get you guys home." Lena said happy that she could leave after being dragged all around the mall. Me and Mariana laughed at how relieved her tone was but got into the car anyways.

Once we arrived at home we found that we had beaten the boys. Two minutes after we started folding all of my stuff the boys walked in.

"What took you guys so long I thought girls were the ones who are supposed to take forever shopping?"

"Well we didn't go to the mall like you guys did so we should actually be the winners here." Jesus said.

"You guys could have gone to the mall and we had a longer drive than you guys anyways and I had to try on a lot of clothes thanks to Mariana." I retorted.

"No way we had to drive around more than you guys did and Jude had to try on stuff to." Brandon said.

"Really did Jude have to try on dresses skirts jeans shirts tank tops bras and shoes?" Mariana fought back.

"No but you guys don't need all of that stuff." Jesus said back.

"I may not need all of it but I needed to get at least a dress pants shirts bras and shoes what did you guys need to try on?" I came back with.

"Shirts pants and shoes." Jude said in defeat.

"See that just proves the point that you guys are just really slow." Mariana said proudly.

"Yeah well what if we got more stuff than you?" Jesus tried to say strongly but then realized that he knew they didn't. Me and Mariana looked at each other and grabbed all of my bags and showed them it all.

"I'm sorry you were saying?" I said with a sweet voice.

"Yes girls win you get to make dinner." Lena said to Steph.

"What his was a bet not cool guys no wonder you were rushing us." Brandon and I said at the same time.

"Oh moms since tomorrows Friday can me and Callie maybe explore around town with some of the extra money to buy her a little more so that she feels at home." Mariana questioned.

"Wait a minute you guys are talking and not fighting I never would have thought this would happen I thought you would be arguing more after shopping with each other." Jesus said smiling knowing it would annoy his sister.

"Oh knock it off Jesus you're just jealous that me and Callie are friends already and you are still a loser." She retorted.

"Kiddos play nice okay no fighting." Lena butted in before it got bad.

"Yes mom." They replied in unison.

I pulled out my phone and finally responded to Wyatt. It had been on the whole time because me and Mari were taking pictures but I never thought to respond to him.

_Callie: hey sorry for the late response I was out shopping but I wasn't feeling good glad to know you care._

_Wyatt: hey yeah I missed seeing you in English it was boring not being able to look at your beautiful face._

_Callie: you're too nice listen I have to go but I'll talk to you tomorrow_

I said shutting off my phone not in the mood to move my arms that much. After dinner I ate and went upstairs and talked with Mariana about everything till we both fell asleep.

**Hey so what did you think sorry for going on and on about clothes but I was having fun. This was my longest chapter so far so I hope you liked it. Listen guys please review it gives me inspiration for the next chapters and makes me feel like you guys actually enjoy my writing. Remember stay safe and please don't hurt yourself darling your worth more than that okay. Love you my beautiful love muffins review and I'll update either tomorrow or the day after.**

**XOXO kisses XOXO**


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